Do You Ever…?

A lot of thoughts running through the human mind.

πŸ˜ͺ I have ………… πŸ˜‚πŸ™ŠΒ I’m trying to be serious here πŸ™Š. I’ll suck it up. πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚Β Oh, no!

Ok. Take 2. 🀐 I have these thoughts — hypothetical… and wishful — that I just play around with in my head, in my moments of solitude. One that has very recently and stubbornly been on my mind is the existence of a particular “phenomenon” that seems to be beyond me. If you know how to read between the lines, good for you. If you don’t… well, πŸ€·πŸΎβ€β™€οΈ. I’d even only be able to say it to you in a pitch-black room! πŸ˜‚

Do you ever find yourself inexplicably attached to someone and their happiness? πŸ˜•Β It’s really hard for me to get my head around it, because I’m someone who even finds it difficult to develop or sustain attachments to people πŸ˜­πŸ˜‚. So, I don’t know what makes this one different πŸ€”.

Do you ever wonder what it’s like inside someone’s body, and what the world looks like (literally and figuratively) through someone else’s eyes? I do this rather often πŸ™Š. I don’t know what differing colours or what differing perspectives I’m expecting to see, but I do wonder how you see the world. πŸ™ƒ

Do you ever wish you could fast-forward time to when you’re “settled” (using whatever milestones do it for you) so that you can either push yourself more now, or use it as an encouragement for the now? I do, often for the latter reason. I’m anxious often, but not necessarily a lot, about when I will finally get the things I want for myself, so I can encourage my present self that it’s close enough (supposing it is).

Do you ever wish you had a special ability? Oh, who doesn’t πŸ™„! I wish my ability was teleportation πŸƒπŸΎβ€β™€οΈ. I ain’t got no business reading people’s minds or all that crock πŸ˜‚. No offence to those who want that ability πŸ˜„; I once wanted it… but I discovered teleportation 😌. I want to be able to be wherever I want to be at whatever time! I sure won’t be where I am right now πŸ‘€! I’d be in the … wait! That’s my secret escape 🀐. Surely, I can’t give that away πŸ˜‰. No flight or train tickets ever? πŸ™‹πŸΎ Travel solo? πŸ™‹πŸΎ

Finally, do you ever go about your day normally and then get your memory jogged, only to realise that it “was in your dream“? More often than seems normal to me, my day is just in progress as usual. Then I suddenly have “a moment” and say to myself, Oh, that was in my dream! What am I on about? I would have just realised that a memory that came back me to me minutes before did not actually happen in reality; it must have been in one of my dreams the night before πŸ˜•. Weird? I really don’t give a hoot. πŸ™ƒ I’ve learned to live with it and just go “πŸ˜ƒ” every time. ☺️

Until you see me again, ✌🏾.

What Quality of Children Are We Raising in Africa?

The average African may be educated but is unenlightened.

I’ve been bingeing Instagram videos of Katie Stauffer’s twin girls and the McClure twins — oh, who doesn’t! πŸ™„ — for longer that I can remember or care to admit. I also occasionally come across videos of children who are outspoken, clearly smart, are exposed and whose parents are visibly interested in their development.

This is the thing: the average African — who lives in Africa or lived there for a long while — is very likely to think that such children are far developed than their years and are doing “exploits”. The truth is that these children are not necessarily developed beyond their years. They’re just surrounded by an environment — comprising of their parents, the educations system, the right media and more — that is aware of the need for these children to develop at the scientifically and academically recommended level for their ages. This type of environment is what is generally missing in Africa. Some are even naturally more developed beyond their years, but unlike their Africa-based counterparts, they are provided with the right resources to aid their development, and the right people to help them harness these available resources.

Once upon a time, I used to wonder why some people sound so regressive and unexposed in their thinking. My cousin made it clear: a lot are educated, but few are enlightened. A lot of African parents are educated but unenlightened. They are knowledgeable but they are not exposed. They are not aware of the potentials and the heights at which their children can perform. They are not aware that there are opportunities and more to life than what the African educational systems dictate. They keep their children shelled and sheltered from… from what please?

There are African children that are barely below the 2-figure ages, and cannot spell basic words. Their diction is below average for their age, their vocabulary is so sparse, their intellects are substandard. They are unfamiliar with a lot of concepts, with world histories, with world cultures, with technologies, with a whole lot of things. They are not exposed to the skills they should be developing; they’re not exposed to the tools and the facilities with which they can develop these skills. A lot of these children are smarter than years, but there is often no framework in place to allow the expression of their intelligence. It’s a huge shame that in Africa, we are proudly raising children who are significantly substandard for their ages.

I remember thinking more times than I’d care to admit during my degree, how much different my choices would have been and how my life could have panned out if I had more knowledge of the courses available at University before starting. In the average African household, there are only a number of courses a child can select from to study at university: medicine, law, engineering, accounting. Anything else is looking for trouble.

I originally wanted to study Fashion Designing but was asked to find a “serious” course. Fast-forward to my final year in uni and me almost crying every other day for my Law degree to come to an end. Still feeling grossly dissatisfied and unfulfilled, I am now chasing a career in Information Systems and Cyber Security, something I would have paid attention to early on if I hadn’t been brainwashed that those who study IT at university only do so to become cyber fraudsters (419ers).

The educational systems in Africa are only one of many ingredients that cook substandard children and individuals. The average educational institution in Africa does not inform pupils, students and parents/ guardians of the seemingly endless variety of courses available for study at university, inside or outside the country. They don’t do anything to kill the silly superstitions that certain degrees are substandard, insignificant or useless. They don’t provide career counselling. They don’t emphasise on the importance of aptitude tests and on their interpretation, and their application in decision-making. The average African child has to “figure it out all on their own”. It should not be so.

When will African-bred children start to sit at the same table with their inventor, media mogul, entrepreneur, developer, researcher peers? When will the average African child start to grow up enlightened and empowered?

Is Anyone Really a Liberal Thinker?

Maybe we’re all partisan-minded in reality.

I recently watched a video where CNN’s Fareed Zakaria made me realise that a lot of us — including me — that claim to be liberal in our views are really not liberal, in fact.

Fareed’s headline was “Liberals think they’re tolerant, but they’re not”. I must admit, I did feel a tad bit defensive when I first saw the headline, but I immediately remembered that I shouldn’t “judge”. So, I watched the video and was surprised when I was made to realise the error of Continue reading “Is Anyone Really a Liberal Thinker?”

Some Self-Love Ain’t a Bad Idea

You come first.

I was feeling the need to appreciate myself today (not like I don’t do it every other day 😏), so I dug up some notes I’d made for future reference. ☺️

**** Continue reading “Some Self-Love Ain’t a Bad Idea”

Realist Much or Buzzkill?

Being a realist does not equate to being a pessimist.

I’m a logical thinker and a very realistic person, so much so that I’ve been told that I don’t know how to let people enjoy their daydreaming moments πŸ˜….

Someone’s daydreaming loudly around me and I just unsolicitedly butt in and bring them back to earth. No, life doesn’t work that way. You can’t just up and leave and tour the country. You have to make sure that your bills are sorted for the while that you’d be gone. You have to research where you’re going, search for and book or reserve accommodation, calculate how much you’d need, so you can make enough money available. Yada, yada, yada. That’s me. Every single time. People tell me, You don’t know how to be spontaneous. You’re so pre-programmed! Sorry, not sorry πŸ™„. I like to be armed with information before I enter into something 😼. I don’t like to be stranded, physically, mentally, emotionally, however! Mind you, I know how to do spontaneous, just on my own terms. 😏

Now, I’m positive you’ve come across people drawing similarities between being realistic and being pessimistic. I’ve actually had a couple of people tell me outright that I was being pessimistic, only because I was just being practical. To be honest, I think it’s mostly the extreme idealists that believe realists are automatically pessimists. For some people, however, their realism borders on pessimism. Life is an arguably imbalanced mix of good and bad — and in my opinion — the bad weighing more than the good. That’s what is factored in, when a realist speaks. It’s the undiluted awareness of more bad than good that causes realists to sound pessimistic. We just tell it like it is. No watering down of the reality of things.

A pessimist, on the other hand, is often the one who just ignores all the good stones on the “good” scale and just sees “bad” all over the place. There’s always something bad in every situation. There’s always a hole in the rainbow that comes after every storm. The honey in the pot is always bad or infested with dead bees. The sun that comes after the rain will give you some serious sunburn. πŸ™„ It just never ends with them. Nothing good to say, ever. They, not the realists, are the buzzkills.

Here’s the thing: pessimists aka buzzkills are identifiable. If their input is never helpful and is ever depressing or discouraging, without providing an alternative, they’re a buzzkill, a pessimist. They shoot down every good idea, oh, and they never have any good ones either!

For some people, it’s actually their nature to be pessimistic. It’s obviously not a good trait, at least to those on the receiving end of the pessimist’s negativity. But, however pessimists make an effective journey to the border where they meet optimism, that is the goal.

Drawing a balance between pessimism and optimism is necessary, in my opinion. Being an extreme optimist is often equally identified with being an idealist. “This is how this should be. Things ought to run this way.” There’s nothing wrong with that line of thought. However, where it becomes a train of thought and it does not include facing the reality of “This is how this is. Things are run this way.“, you will have an idealist, who might even be an extreme optimist. The refusal or inability to balance ideals with the reality of things is an idealist’s woe.

In my experience, when a fair equilibrium between optimism and pessimism is reached, you realise that you have a balanced individual who knows how to dream and how to measure that dream against reality. You can’t have your head stuck in the clouds; reality will yank you out by the legs.

Until Friday, stay blessed! ✌🏾

Treat “Everyone” the Way You Want to be Treated?

Sure. I’ll just treat those that matter to me the way I want to be treated.

Yes, it’s a question. Living by the golden rule or doing to others as you would have them do unto you doesn’t apply only to those from whom you’re expecting fine treatment or any kind of treatment. It applies to everyone. Every. Single. Person.

Let me first say, I am a very huge advocate of Continue reading “Treat “Everyone” the Way You Want to be Treated?”

Growing: I Smh a Lot When I “Reflect”

I used to speak “implied”, now I speak “explicit”…

Sometimes, no scratch that, really often πŸ™Š I ask whoever’s secretly listening, What spaceship invaded earth and left this one behind? πŸ˜•

The purpose of reflection (in case no one told you πŸ˜•) is generally for you to recall certain occurrences and circumstances, to pick out important things (often lessons) that you might have missed out. Mine is to measure my wisdom and Continue reading “Growing: I Smh a Lot When I “Reflect””